Thursday, January 20, 2011

Seven Years

Wow, I can’t believe that it has been seven years today that I had my bypass surgery. That winter seemed just as cold and snowy as this one. This is usually just a day that passes and I never take another look at it until my Mom calls to remind me. I won’t be getting that call this year. To be honest, I haven’t getting much of any calls lately. The waiting is really starting to take a toll on me emotionally. But I’ll smile and muddle through it. Yesterday was my first Wednesday off of my shortened work weeks and I had such a great day. I went with my friend Sandy so she could donate blood for me. Her sister Jamie went the night before and my other friend Joe also went yesterday morning. Then we just went back to her house and hung out with her 22 month old daughter and 4-month-old twin boys. Doesn’t sound like it would be very relaxing but it was nice to be around such innocence. Seeing the babies smile really helped lift my spirits as did spending a day out of my house and being able to clear my ever-wandering mind.

I’ve been thinking a lot about what it’s going to be like when the actual call comes. I’m sure it will come in the middle of the night and the drive down to Philly will seem like forever. That should at least give me enough time to call everyone I need to. The waiting once we get down there will bring even more anxiety. Just my Dad and I. I think about him too. I have the easy party. A little shot of some happy drugs and then I wake up after what seems like a few minutes. My Dad is the one who has to sit and wait. Completely by himself for hours in a city that he is unfamiliar with. Things have changed so much since I made the decision not to fight my insurance company and just have the transplant in Philly.

With that being said, I seem to have everything in place on my end. Just missing the final part. The pièce de résistance if you will. I have all my paper work filled out to go on disability with work. I have my “pregnancy” bag fully packed and ready to go. I am ready. I need this to come soon. I need to be able to end this chapter of my life and start a new one. A chapter full of new opportunities and adventures. Only time will tell exactly what they are but I can’t wait to find out.

They say seven is a lucky number. Let’s hope luck is on my side…


  1. I know your heart will be here soon! We'll get through it. And the "P"s will be here for you. Love you!

    PS A baby made you happy? really?? :)

  2. The Story of Tin Man:

  3. Gav loved hanging out with you. He asked this morning if Bryan would be at the Jeane's house (his morning babysitter)!? Not quit as innocent as the 4month old(s) but still good for a laugh! See you soon.

  4. if dad needs someone local to sit with when the time comes, I'm only a phonecall away! :) Your heart will be here before you know it, and then you'll feel like a million bucks! I literally think about you every day shman, always in my thoughts, love you!